I am Beautiful... right?

Every time I see an add for kids (I'm talking pre-teens and up) clothing, events, etc. I look at the models and think "What kind of kids actually look like this?"

To what am I speaking? Well I'll lay it out for ya: perfect skin and hair, size 2 and whatever it is for guys, mature situations, looks, clothing, etc...

These children are already being set up for plastic, airbrushed lives. It's like Disney kids. I had a roommate once that thought life was a fairytale, that "all her dreams could come true." These kids, bless their souls, are being lead into a life of predetermined menus, education and schedules.

But I digress.

The reason I bring this up is I discovered something about myself the other day. I've been in Okinawa now for about a week and consequently on base the majority of that time. The other day I went with my sister to help her find a job and as I was waiting for her to finish the paperwork I started flipping through a magazine. Even though it was a base issued magazine, it still had ads for just about everything.

And then I came upon an ad for a teen summer camp. It's in a foresty area with 4 or 5 boys and girls in the foreground. Probably children of military members. And the first thing I thought when I looked at them was: "Wow. They couldn't get some skinnier girls?"

*GASP* How could I say that? I stood there disappointed in myself for having thought that. Looking down at the picture I could see the normality in each of the kids, and quite possibly the smiles on their faces came from that. Who am I to judge them? I felt that shiny, cold grasp of the world as it was subliminally telling me what I should think. I sit here, talking about how I believe in individuality and self worth. Yet I find anything less than what the norm is wrong and unattractive (the norm being what the media has told us it should be).

So what can I do about this? Physically? I feel nothing. But maybe it's about time I actually start believing what I tell everyone I do. Perhaps that is another problem with our society today. A lot of people sitting on high horses, standing on royal, lofty pedestals. In reality, all those people should be standing on the ground with everyone else. Uniting in ideology and acting to change things, not just talk about them. As we've seen from our President we can talk all we want about hope and change, but it doesn't just happen cause a lot of people like us and think we have a good idea.

"Imagine all the people." Not just a few. But all. That'll be a good day.

Song of the post: True Love Will Find You in the End by Mates of State

No One

Has anyone heard of this show called "What Would You Do?" I've only just barely discovered it about a week or 2 ago. At first I thought it was really interesting (slash hilarious...) to see some of the reactions people had to someone trying to steal a bike, or a drunk girl at a bar, etc. And I won't lie. Ya, I still find it pretty funny; however, I've slowly become appalled by the lack of moral integrity in Americans (generalization here because it only shows Americans).

Right now I feel that I'm about to take a seat on a Shire horse (look it up... it's huge). But this is my blog and I can say what I want!

Ok. So here's my beef. We as American's have been loosing the capacity to step in when things are going wrong... and this is just every day stuff! When things like 9/11 or Katrina and the like happen, the majority of people are there fixin it up! But when a girl at a restaurant who appears to be beaten and is being verbally and somewhat physically abused by her boyfriend in public people for some reason have a hard time saying "Hey, that's not cool" and then helpin the poor girl out. (Side note: in the episode this happened in, some white grandma said about the black couple that they must be a pimp and whore couple...ok...)

All of these situations are put up by actors, but specialists kinda follow up on each scenario that the show puts on. Have you ever seen someone in need and completely ignored it thinking "It's not my business" or "Someone else will take care of it"? Recently, I had this kind of experience.

At the beginning of this semester I didn't have a flute teacher. It wasn't until a good month after school had started that I got one. She's really great. A wonderful woman and teacher. Unfortunately, she doesn't actually live here. She drives up Sunday nights from Utah and then drives back to her family Wednesday mornings. Sucks, right? One fine day I had this thought: "What is she eating for dinner?" I thought it couldn't be anything spectacular because I knew she was staying in a hotel and therefore probably was enjoying frequent pb&j sammiches and the like. So I decided to take it upon myself to hook her up with some awesome meals so that 2 nights out of the week she wouldn't have to eat unpleasantries. Once I started this, I thought to let other girls in the flute section have an opportunity at it. So I wrote up this calendar with the rest of the semester's Mondays and Tuesdays on it. The first couple people I told were really excited about it and signed up. Everyone who heard about it thought it was a really good idea, so I was feelin pretty cool.

Soon thereafter, however, a couple of people gave me the big "Well, I'll think about it." Ok. Cool. Now, I may be super rude for feelin this way, but I think that when you are given such an easy way to help someone, why would you not? A problem people were facing was that Mondays and Tuesdays are super busy for them and they aren't even done with their days until 5.45. Ok. Well, she can't even eat til after 7 or 8. I have class until 8 on Tuesdays, but somehow managed to make Chicken Poblano for her yesterday. I dunno...

Ok. In the end, the entire calendar got filled up. I haven't completely lost hope in the possible charity or morality of my fellow men. But I still think it's something we all need to kinda sit back and think about. Sometimes we can't sit around and wait for someone to give us something to do, or wait for someone else to step up first.

Fellow Americans: act.



Song of the Post: Lonely Nites by Vic Ruggiero

Sheep in Sheep's Clothing

For years there have been two colors that have dominated a certain style of clothing. In the 50s it was popular as well. But somehow, back in like, 2007, black and red leaked out of a gothic wardrobe and crept into dresses for young women. There would be black dresses with white polka dots with red trim, or white dresses with some kind of red and black design... you get the idea. Eventually wearing as much black as you could with some red "highlights" became popular too. This is where we see a problem (or at least I do...).

Ladies and gentlemen. It is 2010. Heck! It's spring! Not only should you not be wearing this atrocious and outdated style, but it's too sunny and beautiful out to wear this dark color palate. I can only imagine where this fad came from. Someone somewhere decided that the goths had it right with the whole black and red thing and then some "classy" designer decided to throw his girls in little black dresses with patent red leather pumps.

Now. I will admit. I have done this. But recently I have witnessed a huge violation of this style. Firstly, if you are going to do this, make sure the clothes fit you right. If you have curves, chances are you shouldn't wear a big belt around your waist/bust. That idea is for those little stick girls who want to show off any curves they wish they might have.

Secondly, don't over layer. Don't wear a black skirt with a black blouse with black tights with the black belt and then the red shoes with either black or red accessories. Blech. And PLEASE, if you are gonna wear red lipstick, wear the right shade for your complexion. It's very unlikely you'll be able to pull it off like Scarlett Johansson did a few years ago any way (note when this happened...a few years ago!!).

On the subject of spring. Ok. I'm not much of a flowery, girly girl. Until last summer, I mostly wore t-shirts and jeans every day. But then I really took to stores like H&M and Urban Outfitters. Then last semester as the sun started comin out for longer and the temp went up a few degrees, I started having this weird desire to wear floral prints. Ladies!!! Get a nice floral print dress! Get some flowy polyester blouses while you're at it! Since I'm a poor college student, I'm having to rely on a roommate of mine for these things...but once I can get down to SLC and roam through UO, I'll but a much happier laday.

Alas. I do live in Idaho. And as many know, not only does real fashion (look at European stores, i.e. United Colors of Benneton, H&M, etc) take forever to reach the US, but even longer to get to our little farm towns out here in the west! So what are we to do? First off, even though many don't like this for lack of dressing room, online shopping isn't a bad idea. Also, travel to your closest mall to find classy stuff. I'm not sayin everyone out here is totally inept of puttin a good outfit together...but I'm not sayin people are great at it either. Make sure you do some research first. Go check out Urban Outfitters' website and get some ideas. You don't have to spend $58 on a blouse to get the look ya like!

As Stacy and Clinton would say, it's best to have a few really good items you can mixT and match than a trillion nasty things that well... you can't.

There are so many other bad things I see in this sad little town, but I feel I would implode if I kept on thinking about how sad all these dresses who are "blissfully" ignorant to what is actually in style and attractive.

Other than this, life is going pretty great. I had my first concert of the semester tonight and was actually surprised at the turnout. What I was not surprised by was the unfortunate falling apart of the strings (and winds in some parts...but mostly strings :P). I did really enjoy playing. Man. I love performing in a symphony. Honestly, I love that unity that music brings. Someone playing a part that ties together with other melodies. Overlapping rhythms that tease the mind and harmonies that bring up feelings you never though music could. Ahh... music.

Song of the post: Schumann's Symphony No.3

For the Benefit of Missus Kat

Hey there world, it is I: Kat. I am feeling quite perplexed these days. Before I get to that, I'd like to tell you why I've started this blog.

I am nearing the end of my college days. Well, I'm not that close. But 2 1/2 semesters seems pretty close to me. So I've decided to get some thoughts out that perhaps some will find amusing, helpful or whatever... Maybe even get some feedback on what to do as I meet tall brick walls that I'll somehow get over. But by this time next year I will have returned to you and your inhabitants, making myself another member of a hopefully productive society. Unfortunately, I'm already freaking out about this. Hence, the perplexing.

Right now I'm a student at the wonderful BYUI. If you have just happened upon my blog and have never heard of such a school, it is a Church school of about 12000 students. Pretty decent size. But there's a reason you haven't heard of it: it is located in the remote town of Rexburg, ID. I graduated high school from an awesome school in Northern VA, where the majority of students go to other East Coast schools. I can see that I have one leg up on my education: my tuition is significantly smaller than these other schools because the majority of funding for this school comes from members of my Church. And despite the excellent education I am receiving here, I know that the paper that says "Graduate of Brigham Young University Idaho" doesn't really compare to the one that says "Radford" or "Mary and Washington". And it's just a piece of paper!

So you might see where I'm goin with this, World. I'm getting anxious about graduating because I'm beginning to fear that there is no place for me amongst the trillions of other people out there. Did I mention I'm studying music?! I don't know why I set myself up for a life of poverty (unless I marry a rich farm boy). Ok. I do. I love music. I adore music. I love surrounding myself in it: in orchestra, music history, teaching. Any other path would've been wrong for me. But BYUI isn't exactly known for its music school. While it's very good and great musicians have come from here, in the end, it is quite mediocre in comparison to, I dunno, Rice, UT, Julliard, Arizona... I could go on.

So what do I do and where do I go to do it? I don't see myself stickin around here after I graduate. Ideally, I'd move back to Virginia or Texas at some point. But what would I do there? Work? Work where? Does a Bachelors in Flute Performance get me a decent paying job anywhere? Or do I go to grad school? Yet another reason to freak out. I'm not exactly looking forward to the many letters of rejection that I'll more than likely receive. Or do I, as is so popular at this school, get married and start poppin out babies while my husband finishes his degree? This is a tough subject... and it technically isn't an option since I can't force that... It's just a facetious thought.

Anyways... These are just some thoughts that have been sittin with me for quite some time. We'll see if I make a decision before I graduate... April 2011, I see you, and here I come.

Song of the post: Little Secrets by Passion Pit